Yookit what I can do!

Today was another small step in the culottes world: I took Solanne out all morning without a diaper. Up until now, she's only worn underwear in the safety and comfort of our own home. This morning we set out for the daycare, the bank, an office supply store, and the grocery store. All in underwear. At every stop, I made sure we took a little bathroom break, to relieve Solanne's bladder and my fears of leaks.

She did spectacularly well. I was so proud of her! When we got home, I announced to Derek (who was working from home today) that we were dry. Okay, I use the we term here too freely; of course I was dry. But the important part was that Solanne was dry, too.

Anyhow, I reminded her of the bathroom and not to pee in her pants. She went off to play; I started putting away the groceries. And not two minutes into the door, Solanne ran over to me, looked up at me, and said,

"Look at what I can do!"

She spread her pant-clad legs and peed. Right there, on the kitchen floor.

I just roared out a "NOOOOO!!!" and picked her up, stripped her and brought her to the bathroom. I was livid... and not for the reasons one might think.

You see, this harkens back to a story my mom tells about me. I was about two and a half, fully potty-knowledgeable. I stood in the kitchen, spread my legs, looked my mom in the eye, and peed on the floor.

So what bugged me most was not Sol's behaviour? It wasn't that she thought this was a great joke. It wasn't that I knew she could hold it and deliberately didn't. It wasn't even that I had to clean it up. It was that she was like me.

Every day of this child's life, I look at her and realise how much of my personality is in her. She's a terrible tease. She loves to laugh. She is smart but sometimes lazy. She is such a good kid, except when she's not: then she's almost a terror. She loves to joke around. She knows how to spin a good pun. All of this is me. It makes me proud and frightened all at once to have someone around who is so much like me. I avoid mirrors as much as possible... and here I gave birth to one.

sigh.